with photos for you to look at
I don't even know which ones I'd choose.
How to define this life
in chosen moments,
small echoes of the days I kept paper copies of beaches
always beaches
and sand,
lakes, dry and fluid
I am a coastal child
defined less by that than by the lack of images to mark these days.
I have spent so much time
listening to what I thought was right
that I no longer have any words of my own.
On the outside
big words make people cringe when they know you
big words make people put up their walls
run away,
hide from things because they forget how short this all can be
in its length, in its duration,
they forget how quickly it can change,
days into hours into minutes
gone.
People die
people crash
people hurt
people leave
who else knows
how hard it is to have all this love
and nowhere safe to put it
you know I love you
and I'm not allowed to say it
not supposed to feel it
we overcomplicate things
we do
love is love
and if we could all just live in that
even for moments a day
nothing else would matter so much
nothing else would twist us up so much.
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